Thursday, July 28, 2016

quicksand, twitter, and hashtag casserole

Guys.

Apparently I used to have a blog that I updated with some hilarious things every now and again, and sometimes made people cry in a beautiful way (beautiful crying is way different from ugly crying. I hope to death I haven't made anyone ugly-cry).

Apparently this is that blog, and APPARENTLY I LEFT MYSELF SIGNED IN.

Totally fortuitous. If I hadn't, bye-bye-bloggie. I'd have no idea how to get back into it, starting with the signing in process.

As I'm writing this, there's a bar at the top of my screen that says the blog host doesn't support this browser and it may result in unexpected behavior.

Puh-leez. I've got kids. Unexpected behavior from a browser window has nothing on that.

Since we last talked, we've finished some septic work in the backyard, acquired chickens, got rid of the chickens, had a baby, put our cat through eye removal surgery so now he is worth even less, canned a million jars of fruit jam, refinished our bathroom, mopped my floors probably twice, and didn't sleep. I know, I know. All of it, excuses for why I abandoned the blog. I learned to hashtag, I've gotten on Twitter, I'm still eating gluten, and I won't touch kale. I've read a lot of good books that have warmed my heart, challenged my paradigms, and had me sobbing in my tea by the last page. Speaking of tea, I've given up drinking it sweet. #majorlifechange #whoamIeven #Idontevenknowmyselfanymore   And speaking of books, I've written my own and am ruthlessly pursuing rejections by literary agents until I find a magical combination of right time, right agent, right mood. And a bunch of other rights I haven't stumbled into yet, but I'm sure they're out there. Self publication is not in my cards or in my pocket or in the stars or whatever the saying is. I'm not touching that event with a ten foot pole.

Speaking of touching things with a ten foot pole: you know what I used to really think about a lot as a child that had me frightened for a very long time? Quick sand. Funny how that turned out to not be as much of a problem in adulthood.

Lots of things to be glad about. The absence of quicksand is at the top of my list, no two ways about it.

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